5 Things: French food, soccer, art, theater, and a good old-fashioned beard ‘n ‘stache competition

Bring your bike, bring your facial hair, bring your appetite, and bring your nostalgia for Mufasa.

April 28, 2016; 10:10 AM • by Rachel Marsh

1. French Food Festival

I’m supposed to be convincing you why these festivals are worth checking out, but I just…I just can’t understand why anyone would need convincing. It’s French food, guys. That means baguettes. Croissants. Fancy cheese. Red wine. Puffy pastries that dissolve into airy bliss the second they touch your tongue. If you’re still on the fence, just look at the menu page.

Friday, April 29th • 4:30 – 7:30 PM and Saturday, April 30th • 11:00 AM – 9:00 PM
Little Sisters of the Poor, 1503 Michaels Road
Free to attend!

2. Disney’s The Lion King

The Broadway version of The Lion King is HERE! It’s just like that movie that we all know and love. Unfortunately unlike the movie, you can’t rewind to rewatch all the good parts (Simba and Nala falling in love!) or fast forward through the bad parts (Scar, don’t!). But I think the fact that it’s a Tony Award-winning musical with incredible costumes and extraordinary songs and outstanding performers will probably make up for it.

Through May 8th • see site for times
Altria Theater, 6 N. Laurel Street
Starting at $28

3. Bike RVA Fest

Your poor neglected bike has been enviously watching your car take you places all winter. But spring has sprung, and the weather is finally bike-friendly. Dust off the cobwebs and give your bicycle the attention it’s been longing for. This Saturday, the Richmond Kickers is offering discounted tickets to everyone who rides their bike to the soccer game. Plus, free bike valet! And free tune-ups! And bike safety vendors! Oh, and beer! Pedal down to City Stadium and let your car do the envying for a change.

Saturday, April 30th • kickoff starts at 7:00 PM
City Stadium, 3201 Maplewood Avenue
$8 for bikers!

4. Mid-Atlantic Beard and ‘Stache Championships 5

This whole time you thought all those hipsters were growing out their facial hair for fun! But in fact, it’s to compete with each other over who has the longest beard or best sideburns or curliest mustache. And of course to raise money for a good cause.

Saturday, April 30th • 6:00 -ready 11:00 PM
The Canal Club, 1545 E. Canal Street
$15 in advance, $20 at the door

5. Arts in the Park

If this were Christmastime, I would tout this as a great opportunity to get some Christmas shopping done. But it’s nowhere near Christmas, so you can go and just buy some jewelry, paintings, and other art-related indulgences for yourself without feeling guilty. Plus you’ll be supporting local artists, and double plus, it’s free.