The anti-Valentine’s Day

We realize some of you have no interest in celebrating Valentine’s Day whatsoever. In order to help you avoid those schmoopy-loopy events happening around town that might cause the vom to creep up the back of your throat (graphic!), we’ve pulled together a list of events that should provide a decidedly non-Valentine-y experience.

January 30, 2011; 8:54 PM • by RVANews staff

We realize some of you have no interest in celebrating Valentine’s Day whatsoever — either you think it’s a manufactured holiday and/or it’s just a reminder of a relationship status with which you might not be so pleased. In order to help you avoid those schmoopy-loopy events happening around town that might cause the vom to creep up the back of your throat (graphic!), we’ve pulled together a list of alternative events happening Valentine’s Day weekend that will likely score low on the schmoopy-meter.

(Note: We can’t guarantee that the powers-that-be running these events won’t make any mentions of Valentine’s Day. But we think you’ll probably be ok.)

Dog Sees God: Confessions of a Teenage Blockhead

This dark comedy (also an unauthorized parody) takes the Peanuts characters from the Charles Schulz comic strip and places them 10 years into the future, smack dab in the middle of high school.

• Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday performances (afternoon and evening show times available)
• Firehouse Theatre (1609 W. Broad Street)
• 804-355-2001
• $25 for adults; $22 for seniors; $10 for students (with ID)

Broken Hearts

Say “No” to Valentine’s Day with this event promising an evening of art, food, wine, R&B, indie rock, electro, and soul. Special instructions: dress like your heart has been broken, whatever that may be. Just no sweats, try to look decent (their words, not ours — we love sweatpants over here!). Click the link above for more information. To RSVP, send name to: Champainera@gmail.com.

• Friday, February 11 (8pm to midnight)
• C’est Le Vin (15 N. 17th Street)
• 804-649-WINE (9463)
• Free to get in

Prisoners of Love

Our very own Checkout Girl joins award-winning storyteller Slash Coleman for an evening filled with tales of broken hearts, doomed relationships, and misplaced affections. They’ve got two versions for you: one for couples and one for singles. We’re sure that either one you go to will be (as The Checkout Girl puts it) “an alternative to the usual yawn-yawn options that plague Valentine’s Day.”

• Saturday, February 12 (couples show starts at 6:30; singles show starts at 9pm)
• 804-353-3799
• Crossroads Art Center (2016 Staples Mill Road)
• $15 for singles; $30 for couples

VCU vs. ODU

Sports! What’s Valentine’s Day-like about that? NOTHING.

• Saturday, February 12 (2pm)
• Siegel Center (1111 W. Broad Street)
• 804-827-1000
• $20

Nunsense!

They’re nuns. They aren’t even allowed to be in love with anyone! Except Jesus?

• Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday performances through February 27 (afternoon and evening show times available)
• Barksdale at Hanover Tavern (13181 Hanover Courthouse Road)
• 804-282-2620
• $38

Richmond Derby Demons: Lovers’ Brawl (Broad St. Brawlers vs. Carytown Crashers)

Ok, the name of the event mentions love, but this sport involves roughing people up, so it can only be but so lovey-dovey.

• Sunday, February 13 (5pm)
• Rollerdome (4902 Williamsburg Road)
• 804-726-2841
• $5 in advance; $7 at the door (kids are free

Bizarre Bits: Oddities from the Collection

This quirky exhibit from the Virginia Historical Society closes on February 13, so this is perfect timing. As the website explains, “Historical items range from the bullet that killed the first Confederate officer, nails from the part of the Capitol that collapsed in 1870, a list of knights at an 1865 joust, fungus carved with the likeness of R. E. Lee on Traveller, “Junior Partner” cigarettes in their original pack featuring an image of a child, a 6,000 year old piece of wood from the Canary Islands, and a silhouette cut by an armless Virginia woman with her mouth.”

• Runs through Saturday, February 13 (open Tuesdays through Saturdays from 10pm to 5pm)
• Virginia Historical Society (428 N. Boulevard)
• 804-358-4901
• Free!

Whitechapel

So… Whitechapel. Yeah just click that link back there. Something tells me there will be very little Hallmark happening.

• Saturday, February 13 (6:30pm)
• The National (708 E. Broad Street)
• 804-612-1900
• $17

Savion Glover: SoLo iN TiME

Perfect for those of you looking to spend the evening with friends. But be warned: it is highly possible that all members of your party will leave the show completely in love with Mr. Glover — that man can DANCE.

• Monday, February 14 (7:30pm) and Tuesday, February 15 (7:30pm)
• Camp Concert Hall, Booker Hall of Music (University of Richmond)
• 804-289-8980
• $36 for adults; $28 for UR employees; $34 for seniors; $18 for kids; free for UR students

January 30, 2011 8:54 PM 0