Kickers vs. St. Louis FC in the Kickers Prediction Game of Awesome

Prior to every home game a panel of so-called experts will predict the outcome of the Richmond Kickers game. Each expert receives one point for each correct prediction. At the end of the season the winner gets a trophy and pack of gum.

August 21, 2015; 11:52 AM • by Richard Hayes

Saturday, the Richmond Kickers (8-6-9) are back in town and look to right their becalmed ship. The opponent, St. Louis FC (6-9-8) could be just the team to give the Kickers a bit of much needed momentum. St. Louis sits seven points behind in the standings and six wins on the season so far, but four of those wins have been on the road, so they can’t be judged on standings alone.

The Kickers’ most recent game will be remembered for three things: Worra making incredible saves, fan favorite and Japanese international Imura getting his first goal, and Kickers losing on a stoppage time goal which conveniently coincided with the live internet feed going out. The two previous game included a tie to Rochester and a loss to Harrisburg. The tie in Rochester on Sunday was a good result considering the Kickers, through what can only be described as moronic scheduling by USL, had played Harrisburg less than 24 hours before. Plus, Rochester sits at the top of the standings.

St. Louis picked up their second home win of the season last night against the Charleston Battery. They were forced to take on the Battery missing five players who were suspended by USL for disciplinary reasons. Against they Kickers they’ll be  without Brandon Barklage, Richard Dixon, and Jermie Lynch all out due to injury. Brandon Barklage might be familiar to MLS fans from his time with D.C. United, New York Red Bulls, New England Revolution, and most recently the San Jose Earthquakes.

Official game preview is here. Saturday there are two promotions: one involving families and one involving shades. Family Fest means admission is just $20 for the whole family before 6:30 PM, or, if you more of the lone wolf type, you can get a ticket and a pair of limited edition Nectar sunnies for just $20!

	Prediction	Reasoning	Score
RVANews Soccer Guru		Kickers are heading down the home stretch of their season. They’re not riding at the head of the pack on a perfect thoroughbred nor are they trailing behind on a burro of despair. They’ve got a steady steed that just needs to take off the silly sun bonnet that some fool put on its head and let him run.	6
Red Army		There comes a time in sports when a team has to measure itself against the best to determine where it stands. This is not one of those times. Playing on a real field, against a mediocre opponent, will push the Kickers back into the win column.	7
Richmond Kickers		So, is Saint Louis known for anything more than an arch? I mean I know they are bad at the American version of football. On that alone (plus the fact that we beat them earlier in the season) I will say that Richmond takes all 3 points, which a 3 sideways is 2 arches and 2 arches are better than 1 arch.	7
Total Soccer Show		The Kickers are winless in their last three games, which basically means the world is off its axis. So either the Kickers will return us to normality by beating expansion team St. Louis (just like they did in July, 3-1) or gravity is going to fail and we’re all going to float off into the cold nothing of space. No pressure guys.	7

RVANews Soccer Guru (Richard Hayes): All of Richard’s soccer knowledge comes from playing FIFA on the original Playstation and standing in bars, drinking, and yelling at the television. He also helps run RVA DCU and is a member of American Outlaws Richmond Chapter, which mainly involves drinking and yelling at televisions.

Red Army (Matt Myers) — Reigning Champion: Matt was sent off by Leigh Cowlishaw in a summer camp scrimmage as a pre-teen but has not held that against the team. He’s coming to grips with being a relatively old man now after seeing the youngsters in the Red Army and on the Kickers roster. He’s also attended way more matches than he should admit to, especially for having lived in Richmond a total of one out of the last 13 years.

Richmond Kickers (Kickeroo): The Kicker from down under. He doesn’t really like anyone who isn’t a fan of the Kickers. A daredevil who will pretty much try anything and everything but would rather not talk (on advice from the lawyers) about the incident with the scooter and the Flaming Hoop of Death, he’s also a sensitive marsupial who enjoys long walks on a dew-covered soccer field and watching the sun set behind the goal post. He also shares something with the new Kickers beer, Kick It Hunny hops.

Total Soccer Show (Daryl Grove): Daryl is English, so everything he says about footsoccerball naturally carries more weight because he says it in a British accent. He is also part of the excellent local radio show and podcast Total Soccer Show that keeps track of all soccer related things in an intelligent and fun way. If you’re not listening to the Total Soccer Show, you need to change that posthaste.

August 21, 2015 11:52 AM · in Fan of the Fan, Hills and Heights, and more 0