2011 Garden Wars: Week 2

Whoa. Last week was kind of intense. There we many votes, many nice things were said, and far too little smack was talked. Come on people!

Whoa. Last week was kind of intense. There we many votes, many nice things were said, and far too little smack was talked. Come on people!

After the complete and utter torrent of votes were tabulated from last week we have Sarah in first place! Following this week’s voting, we’ll eliminate the competitor with the lowest point total–so everyone is still in it! Get to voting, people!


  • Sarah Milston (5)
  • Ryan Smartt (4)
  • Jorge Salgado (3)
  • Jason Guard (2)
  • Scott Pharr (1)

— ∮∮∮ —

Ryan Smartt

Kids, remember to eat your greens. You can also SHOVE THEM IN YOUR PIE HOLE like Lyla does.

As you recall, last week I shared a photo of my “Miracle Squash” with you. Guess what. The squash is not alone. This is a watermelon plant…which I did not plant. It apparently appeared as a result of last year’s compost. I have 3 or 4 of them, and they seem to be doing ok so far.

Jason Guard

This is bloody dock… also known as red sorrel, or blood-vein sour weed. It comes back stronger each year, and I catch myself repeating, “One day I’m gonna eat that.” Folk remedies say it’s used to treat inflammation, cancer, diarrhea, scurvy, and fever. The lacy foliage almost looks like it’s underwater and that creatures might lurk within its shadows; like crazy looking bugs, long lost action figures, maybe even that troll from the Stephen King movie Cat’s Eye.

For the more conventional garden fan: there’s dinosaur kale in the background and a toy pinwheel as well.

Since I’ve never grown soy beans before, and my household has a voracious appetite for edamame, it was necessary to recruit some gardening help from Japan. Here, Totoro, the king of the forest, performs a ritual that’s guaranteed to elicit copious bean pods from these fledgling soy bean stalks. After this consultation, he boarded his Catbus and was off to rescue other gardeners in distress.

Sarah Milston

This week’s harvest included the first pepper, the first tomato, kale, carrots, and lots of herbs. But what we are really watching is the trellis. What began as a boring porch when we moved in has started to come alive with the hanging trellis. I found the 65inX70in window at the Habitat Restore. It housed peas and beans but we just moved three new plants in–on the left tiger melon, middle is lemon cucumber, and the right is dragons egg cucumber. Harvesting soon.

Earlier this week Lily Jaymes “helped me” harvest corn, tomatoes, and sunflowers. NONE were even close to ready. I was frustrated–gardening with her is magical and really really hard. So, I decided to build her a garden all her own. We hit a few thrift stores for digging and planting tools, salvaged bricks from around the yard and picked a few plants up. I told her there were no rules, so instead of plants we planted rocks. As you can see, she is very very proud.

Scott Pharr

“My [flowers] brings all the [bees] to the yard, and they’re like, it’s better than yours”–no seriously, it’s called bee-balm and it brings the bees.

First cukes! Woo! “We we we so excited” (I thought I’d continue with the lyrical theme I have going). This is Kyla’s favorite veggie (and song), hence her excitement.

Jorge Salgado

Veggies were promised this week…and here it is! No cheap jokes or tricks… just honest to goodness veggie awesomeness growing out of our little patch of dirt. I’m finding it amazing how fast these guys grow, and fully know that we will soon be overrun by mass quantities of them.

Whoa, did I say no cheap tricks…err…GUYS, do you see how cute this kid is?! Cute kid + veggies = a winning combo! No, seriously though, I’m grateful to actually have something coming out of the ground. For next week…I’m hoping some of the squash and tomatoes that I’ve been spying on actually come on through. Till next week!


  • error

    Report an error

Notice: Comments that are not conducive to an interesting and thoughtful conversation may be removed at the editor’s discretion.

  1. Ericasue on said:

    Voting for Sarah Milston! Love the hanging trellis and Lilly Jaymes’s little garden!

  2. I’m voting for me. Because I came in last place. So ME ME ME ME ME!

  3. Cathy Ransom on said:

    I’m voting for Sarah Milston! :)

  4. Lynn on said:

    Very intrigued by the porch trellis and can’t wait to see more pics! My vote is for Milston!

  5. I vote for Jason Guard. I like the giant, unusual plants, the Japanese plush, and the commentary on his the best.

  6. Lauren on said:

    I’m going with Pharr for a few reasons a.) He incorporated the milkshake song into Garden Wars b.) There is an auto-tune reference and c.) He signs my paychecks. PHARR FTW!!!

  7. Laura LoveBug on said:

    I vote for Scott Pharr! (great pics and catchiest captions!)

  8. After Totoro left, I watered the soy bean stalks and the leaves perked up. Edamame, and cult movie references, FTW.
    I vote for me.

  9. Scott Pharr all the WAY!!!

  10. Dan on said:

    Looks like lots of people have picked up on the “cute kids get votes” trick. Still, Sarah gets my vote for the creative trellis!

  11. Jenn Kyzer on said:

    My vote is for Milston- that Lily Jaymes is just too cute and the trellis is so cool!

  12. Susan Sheppard on said:

    my vote is for Sarah Milston, love the no rules garden!!!!

  13. I vote for Kyla — I mean Scott Pharr. La-la, la-la, la…

  14. Michelle on said:

    My vote is for Ryan Smartt. Love the photo of Lyla. I’m anxious to hear what will pop up next in the mystery garden.

  15. Tom Martin on said:

    I’m voting for Ryan, mainly because Lyla is correctly demonstrating that we eat our vegetables with our mouths, not our ears. But smaller bites Lyla, it’s not going to run away!!

  16. Carrie on said:

    Pharr….although if it weren’t for Kyla being so stinking cute in those sunglasses you may have suffered again this week. The milkshake song didn’t hurt either. Oh, and the deck is looking good!

  17. Sarah Rice on said:

    I vote for Scott Pharr!!!

  18. Carla Bryant on said:

    My vote goes to Milston. Love the repurposed trellis but more importantly, Lily’s “no rules” garden!

  19. Kimberleigh on said:

    SCOTT PHARR!! The blood thing scares me,in both apperance and Twilight-ish title.My neice loves cucumbers, and that beautiful little Kyla looks freakishly like an old college roommate I once had :)

  20. hayden on said:

    Milston Milston Milston

  21. BJ Marshall on said:

    Lyyyyyla. You got me on my knees, Lyyyyyyla. I’m beggin’ for some greens.


  22. Scott for his lyrics.

  23. Melissa on said:

    I vote Jason, for
    a) his unusual plant
    c) not having gratuitous pictures of his kids
    d) I’m still thinking about last week’s wisteria. It’s so cool!

  24. I vote for Scott because he told me I had to. That, and because he told me I can’t enter the garden wars because I live in Charlottesville, not Richmond. If I was in this, you’d all be in big trouble! Go Scott!

  25. haylee on said:

    Love LJ and her garden

  26. kimberlee on said:

    Go Milston. Love the trellis and sweet little Lily Jaymes

  27. Bryan on said:

    Milston garden for sure.

  28. Jennifer on said:

    Milston (acutally Lily Jaymes) won me over. I have no doubt something very cool – or possibly magical – is going to sprout from those buried rocks!

  29. brea on said:

    i totally vote for jorge! who can resist that baby girl’s face?

  30. Ryan Smartt on said:

    Here’s the deal:
    1. I was going to vote for Pharr because I felt sorry for him. But I really don’t, so I won’t.
    2. Milston is getting WAY too much love right now.
    3. I voted for Jorge last week.
    4. My vote is for Jason, because of soybeans. Very courageous.

  31. I vote Jorge!!!!!!!!!

  32. Katherine on said:

    So many cute kids! I vote for Sarah because of the trellis and genius idea for her daughter to have her own garden.

  33. I vote Guard, because Totoro = awesome. Also, soybeans are delicious.

  34. I vote for Jason Guard because I also love edamame!

  35. Sandra on said:

    My vote is for Jason Guard!

  36. Kelly on said:

    Scott Pharr. That is all.

  37. Smartt, just because I’m amazed by the fact that Lyla is eating her greens voluntarily.

  38. Sarah Milston! I see Lily James working on her garden everyday.

  39. Catherine on said:

    Pharr gets my vote for the bee balm and cukes. The edamame almost had me. Ms. Milston is playing dirty by posting cute kid picks two weeks in a row.

  40. Voting for Jason Guard! Soybeans, y’all, and cool underwater-looking plants, and he didn’t even pull his (adorable!) kids in to try to sneak in a few cute-kids votes. :P All’s fair in war, but I like that Jason’s trying to do the uphill battle of not pulling out the cute kid guns yet!

  41. Michelle on said:

    I vote for Ryan Smartt! I love the mysterious watermelon plant.

  42. Renee on said:

    Pharr’s Phabulous Bee Balm is impressive, but Milston’s Terrific Trellis gets my vote this week.

  43. lindsey on said:


  44. Jorge Salgado!

  45. Shane on said:

    First let me say that my vote is for sale or trade people. Just because Blago went down this week, doesn’t mean that my vote for whose greens reign supreme will be expensive. I accept excess produce and money.

    That being said, since no one has made a good offer I guess I’ll have to vote for Pharr. Why you ask? He voluntarily attracts bees into the area his precious daughter likes to play. He won’t be with us for long due to a pending CPS investigation* so let’s let him have this week.

    *May or may not be true. Pretty sure it’s not true though.

  46. greggie greg on said:

    SCOTT PHARR – he has the cutest child!

    wait… that’s not what we are voting for…?

    i still pick pharrmer scott.

  47. Totoro! Jason gets my vote.

  48. Simi Denson on said:

    Jorge Salgado! Yay!

  49. SEW on said:

    I vote for Jason!

  50. Bären Jüde on said:

    Salgado all the way!! My vote is for one Mr. Jorge.


  51. Courtney on said:

    I vote for the Milston’s! the kale is to die for ;) AND the joint project really does make it magical!

  52. Jennifer C. on said:

    I’m voting for Jason this week, simply because he is growing something that will treat his frequent digestive uproars :)

  53. Elizabeth Smartt on said:

    I vote Smartt for getting Lyla to eat her greens!!

  54. GranDan on said:

    Ryan Smartt and Lyla, the beautiful greens
    eater, get my vote!

  55. Sarah Milston on said:

    I’m voting for Scott because I don’t want him eliminated.

  56. cloyd on said:

    I’m voting Salgado because those big green q-tips put my cotton ear swabs to shame. They probably taste better when cooked too…

  57. Bill on said:

    Lyla wins it for Ryan Smartt this week. She’s NUMBER 1:):)

  58. Jim Schuyler on said:

    I vote for Lyla and Ryan Smartt–although the language could have been a little less colorful–greens don’t go so well with pie hole…

  59. Sarah on said:

    Milston gets my vote! Love, love, love the trellis.

  60. christa on said:

    i love this kind of war…
    i’m a loyal salgado fan.
    but, do continue to grow on, you fabulous big and little people.

  61. Pharr for the Milkshake song…… and now I will be singing it to myself until my wife takes out her earbuds. At which time I will share. Pretty sure she loves it when I sing the Milkshake song. Yep.

  62. Of course , I have to vote for my precious grand-daughter Lyla eating her greens. Glad to see Ryan is teaching her that “greens ” doesn’t mean green M and M’s (Like her grandfather Bebe says!)

  63. Sarah on said:

    Scott Pharr!

  64. Makaleo on said:

    The Milston’s get my vote. Their gardens and the beautiful trellis are what I see when I look out my kitchen window; it is a delight to look out at the bounty that is the Milstongarten. Can’t wait for the first rock harvest from Lily Jaymes!

  65. Eunice Hutchings on said:

    My vote goes to Milston, the trellis is great. What a great way to make use of an old window.

  66. Ed Hutchings on said:

    My vote is for Milston garden and the continued education it is providing to LJ.

  67. Mana on said:

    Got to vote for that little nieta, Lyla Smartt. Aren’t those eyes just full of monkey-business? My guess is that the hand you don’t see has a chocolate chip cookie! The mystery of it all! and….random squash and watermelon? That garden must be a magic, illogical place where little girls relish the idea of eating spinach and alien crops pop up here and there! Got to vote for that smartt garden.

  68. Christie Thalhimer on said:

    My vote is the Smartt garden!

  69. Christi Csaky on said:

    Jorge, Zuchini and Lyra. Perfect.

  70. Transplant on said:

    Seeing a little girl eat her veggies with such gusto is beautiful! Way to go Lyla and Team Smartt!

  71. Glenn on said:

    The only vote is the Jorge Salgado vote!

  72. Judy Moeller on said:

    OK, gotta vote for Jason (Lyla). Who’s watering while you’re gone???

  73. John B on said:

    Jason Guard all the way.

  74. Ryan Smartt on said:

    Judy, I think you meant to say Ryan on your vote. Right? (Jason is my older brother, remember? And there’s another Jason competing in Garden Wars….so…..)

    Anyway, my neighbor is watering the garden while we’re gone.

  75. Now hold on there, Ryan. A person’s actual statement carries more weight than a parenthetical aside. Maybe it was a Freudian slip? Ya know, like a compost miracle.

  76. Ryan Smartt on said:

    Ah, now I see, Jason. You’re just jealous of my compost.

  77. I vote for Jason Guard. I like the red sorrel and yes, no child labor involved.

  78. Denise Hayes on said:

    I’m voting for Sarah Milston, becuase I think that “no rules” gardening is the way it should be!

  79. I’m voting for Jason. That plant is amazing!

  80. Cara on said:

    Sarah all the way!

  81. Andrew Miller on said:

    +1 for Pharr’s deck project. -1 for no railings (up to code? phase 2?)

    But I gotta give my vote to Sarah. What a cute garden for your little girl! I’m going to steal that idea for my son next year.

  82. Cameron on said:

    This vote goes to Smartt!

  83. wren on said:

    Gotta go for Pharr this week — a perfect combo of lush vegetation, cute kid and yummy vegetables. Love it!

  84. The Smartt bet is on watermelons!

  85. Mr. E on said:

    Have to vote for Mr. Pharr b/c of his lyrical genious this week…

  86. Paul on said:

    My vote is for Smartt, mainly for getting his daughter to actually eat her vegetables.

  87. Clearly, I need to vote for myself this week… but you can’t beat Pharr this week. Vote – Pharr.

  88. Jason Guard all the way! Totoro is watching the edamame? How can you go wrong with that? Besides, blood sorrel? Come on!

  89. ksargent40 on said:


  90. Elizabeth Anderson on said:

    I am voting for the Smart Mystery Garden! I am putting the gardener on notice that this vote also constitutes greasing his palms for some Mystery Watermelon!!

  91. kim litkenhaus on said:

    Sarah and Lily Jaymes Milston get my vote.

  92. lisa on said:

    My vote is for the Milston’s!

  93. Cathy G on said:

    Milston garden all the way!

  94. Diane on said:

    Sarah and Lily Milston

  95. Doug on said:

    Some nice competition going on with the kids and all and some really fine gardening HOWEVER guys don’t cha know there’s no keeping up with a talented determined Sarah!! My vote goes to Milstons’ trellis!

  96. Arona on said:

    My vote goes to the Milstons’ trellis and LJ’s garden. Can’t wait to talk to LJ about her magical garden and see the rock sprouts!

  97. Gail on said:

    My vote goes to Milstons!! No doubt about it :)

  98. Ann Cline on said:

    Loved the window trellis and the ” no rules” rock garden. Very creative. Lily and Sarah you rock!

  99. Judy on said:

    Milston’s very neat trellis and adorable rock garden!!

  100. Love Milston’s very neat trellis and adorable rock garden.

  101. Sterling Stokes on said:

    I vote for Jason.

  102. Tina on said:

    Sarah, Lily Jaymes and the best trellis ever get my vote.

  103. Anne on said:

    I vote for Sara Milston and Lily Jaymes, love her in her little garden and I can’t wait to see the trellis at the end of the season

  104. Cara McDaniel on said:

    I love a good homegrown rock. Milston all the way!

  105. Guard! Because he braved The Cheese Shoppe on a Saturday. ;)

  106. Anne on said:

    Voting for Ryan Smartt!

  107. Anne on said:

    Love those greens!

  108. Sara on said:

    I vote for Ryan Smartt!! Lyla and the watermelon win it!

  109. Liz on said:

    Jorge gets my vote.

    Here’s to Awesomeness !

  110. Jeremy on said:

    I vote Smartt.

  111. Mil on said:

    I’ll bet something magical will be growing in that garden. Babes can create miracles! We will be watching with great anticipation!
    Our vote is for Milston!

  112. Patrick on said:


  113. girlie on said:

    Sarah Milston all the way

  114. daley dale on said:

    I dig the Milston garden.

  115. the fish on said:

    Nothing cuter than Lily James in that garden. Milstongarden gets my vote.

  116. Amber on said:

    Sarah Milston.

  117. Amber on said:

    Sarah Milston gets my vote.

  118. Jen on said:

    I vote jason Guard- Sorrel and Soybeans are delicious and beautiful!

  119. yeah totoro! yeah jason!

  120. Alicia on said:

    Voting for Pharr bc he’s bringing it all together – flowers, bees, veggies, a deck and a hit song.

Leave a comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked with an asterisk (*).

Or report an error instead