Hoping: It was a casual email correspondence, at WORK, no less (i.e. primarily a nice diversion from a boring day), not a courtship. For your own good, lay off the Sparks.

Not Lydia: What Tess said. No big deal. And hey, better than the guy my friend slept with who yelled out “Go Steelers!” when he finished, am I right?

Since he decided to give her a chance, they’ve been off and on in the harmonious involvement department and every time they’re off, it’s because of a huge blow out and he comes running to me. He knows she’s terrible for him and he knows that they’re not supposed to be together and yet he keeps going back for more. He tells me this and seeks my advice about it.

I don’t want to be used and because it makes me feel like I’m playing a big time second fiddle as well as making up for her shortcomings as his confidante/adviser, I’ve told him to leave me alone because being his friend his getting harder and harder for me, emotionally. He says he’ll do it, and stays away from me for a day and then tries to revive our friendship.

I see that he’s doing this to both of us (his ex/current/on-and-off-whatever and me) and I kind of understand why he’s doing this with her. I just don’t get what his motives are with respect to me. I can’t figure out if he’s just an attention-seeker, trying to hold onto me because he knows his current whatever is going to end (at some point)and he wants a back up, or if he’s just scared to let me go (because we legitimately did have something awesome until the girl threw herself into the mix), or all three.

I don’t know what to think in this situation and I don’t know what to do. I care about the guy a lot but I’m feeling increasing stupid for doing so. Do I stick around but sit back and watch their stuff explode, do I keep advising him or do I run like hell?